Bad day.

Nothing worked out for me today. As much as I never want to realize it, family is always there. No matter what. Blahhhhh

I just learned of a couple that had been trying and trying to get pregnant and then finnaly did. She just made it to her 37th week....and found out that the baby passed away a couple days ago. They don't know any details yet. I cannot even begin to imagine how they are feeling. I am sure that they are completely heartbroken. I only know of them from a close friend, but it still makes me want to bust out in tears.

Even though Noah was not planned by any means, I cannot imagine my life without him. Sure, sometimes I think that it would be a lot better if he came a few years down the road, but I am so thankful to have him in my life. He is the reason for the majority of my happiness. I really believe that everything happens for a reason.

That being said, I suppose someone has a plan for that couple. Obviously that baby was not meant to come into this world. Sometimes, especially in a time of such grief, it is hard to realize that. I will definitely keep them in my thoughts and hope that they can come to terms with their loss. Their little girl will be their guardian angel from now on. Rest in Peace, sweet girl.

Today was mostly a lazy day. I did everybody's laundry (including myself) and made breakfast, and actually got ready for the first time in two days. Noah and I went to Ikea, which was extremely overcrowded today. I have no idea why I thought it was a good idea to go on a rainy Saturday. It is so hard for me to go there and not want to buy everything. I did buy a few things though.

This lightweight down comforter that I have been needing for a few months now, considering I wake up almost every night sweating to death.

These awesome bib/shirt/smock things for Noah because he is such a messy eater.

And this salad spinner that I have been wanting.

All in all, I think I only ended up spending like $30. It was so hard for me to resist buying a cinnamon roll. They really know how to getcha. The whole place smells like a freaking cinnamon roll. But I was good, and said no. Mostly because the line was so long. Ha

Phil had to work tonight (more on that part of our lives later) so I have been all alone. I rented Blue Valentine because I have heard such good things about it. But man, it left me feeling so depressed. I do have to say that it was a very good movie, but very sad. It hit home, unfortunately. Oh well.

Tomorrow is Phil's day off so hopefully we will do something all cute and family-like. But I'm sure we will just sit at home and do nothing. Ugh. Story of my life.

Let's try this again....

I told myself I was going to try to write in this as often as possible, but clearly that did not happen. So here goes attempt number two. I really want to be able to go back and read posts about Noah's baby years and months when I can no longer remember them. Well, hopefully I will always be able to remember, but ya know. Life speeds passed before I even realize it. How in the world is my little baby already over 10 months old?! It's so crazy. I really don't know where the past 10 months have gone.

Noah is into EVERYTHING. For the past 15 minutes he has taken nearly every single dvd and game case out of the cabinet and scattered them around the living room. He knows how to stand up, but he will only do it without holding onto something when he doesn't realize that he's doing it. I guess he hasn't fully built up the courage yet. I just know he will be walking any day now. Definitely before he is 1, but probably more like around 11 months.

Just like any other boy, he LOVES to play with things that he knows he is not supposed to have. Sometimes I leave something intentionally on the floor so that he thinks he can't have it, but really he can. It works every time. He laughs so much. It really is the best sound in the world. And he is definitely all smiles.
I never knew it would feel so great to watch my little baby boy grow up. It is very sad to realize that is not so little anymore, but it is so much fun. I love him with all of my heart. Just look at him. How could I not love him?